Finding balance in life is a challenging task. Considering the alarming news about the number of burn-outs and stress related problems, it seems like it is a wide-spread issue. The fact that a lot of people are struggling with finding a good balance in their lives makes me wonder what you can do about it.

The number of publications, books and blog posts about this issue is staggering. The number of different types of advice rank up to the same height. All in all, there is one main cause for stress related problems. In my opinion people commit theirselves way to much. People barely can cope with the issues that come up everyday. Most people take on everything. Just a little bit more won’t do harm will it?

The fact that you commit yourself too much makes that everyday clutter fills your day every day. In the daily turmoil it is hard to think about why your are doing it all for in the end. Occupied by the short term you loose sight on the long term. The long term being: your physical health and your life goals. Yes, I believe that you do not only do harm to yourself physically (e.g. heart related problems). You also fail to ensure you are on the right track in your life.

How to solve this? In my opinion it is quite simple: JUST SAY NO! Say no to all the things that only suck the life out of you. A lot of people are afraid to say no when somebody ask them help or a favour. In fact, what do you think is better: doing a random job on fifty things or doing a really superb job on twenty things. A nice consequence is that in the end you get to do more of what you really like. Value that.

PS: Don’t mistake saying NO with letting good stuff pass by. In order to grow you need to take on new challenging projects. There is always a trade-off between pay-off and risk. In that way you really have to be YES-man.

Bottom line: say NO when it sucks the life out of you.

Effectively reaching your target audience is one of the main challenges in a lot of fields. You encounter it as a writer, as a businessman, as a doctor and so on. So I will keep this one short. Do you feel at home here on this blog?

Bottom line: share your thoughts!

Getting in touch with a new culture always puts pressure on yourself. Uncommon reactions and behaviour makes you reflect on your own frame of mind. In that way it can shake your own mindset upside down. Let me give a practical example. I have read a lot about the cultural redtape in India. In the magnificent book Maximum City from Seketu Mehta he explicitly describes India as the land of the NO. There is a local culture that inhibits that anything can be done but with perseverance a thousand NO’s ultimately change to YES. The key lies in the fact to keep asking.

I absorbed that observation. But I know, theory remains theory. However, today things got real. I had to call for a favour. There had already been some written discussion and things looked good. We had a phone call planned. With big expectations a dialed the number and the phone got picked up. I thought things were already somehow arranged but that was only my personal interpretation. I had to go to all the details again and had to convince the other party. I repeatedly ran into a big “NO, that’s not possible”. On that moment, the quote from the book appeared in my mind. I have got to hang on, I thought. I listened to the objections of the person and finally succeeded in getting some trust. I just kept asking gently and finally got to the grounds where I wanted to be. Afterwards both of us were really satisfied.

Bottom line: Hang in there and take the punches. Good things come to those who persevere.

There is common agreement on the fact that changes happen all the time. In fact, “change is the only constant” as I may quote Confucious. There is a lot of things that can be said about this topic and change is probably a topic that will appear in my blog several times. This time I chose to highlight one specific element.

It is about how people cope with change and the fact that we all struggle with it. When we take this matter to big organisations we see that people from all over hierarchical ladder are affected by it. Even the people high up in the ranks of the organisation really do not have a clue. The best guess they can make is to do a thorough consultation of the issues people have in the organisation and of the challenges that probably lie ahead. In my opinion, this kind of consultation rounds are plain necessary in order to make justifiable strategic decisions. As a supplementary effect the people that are being asked for advice feel appreciated for their contribution.

Bottom line: calmly look in the face of change

I need not to say that the choice for stability is man’s second nature. We all like new things but as long at is containable. With time we build up things that we need to take care of like a house, mortgage, children and the list goes on. I am not making a judgment on this it is only that I don’t feel obliged to follow that route (yet).

Whenever you make a decision that is border crossing you can see the admiration in the eyes of people that sometimes feel stuck to the debt they owe. It is like is gives them a glance on things that might have been. A decision they did not pull through a long time ago and is now even less easy to make.

Bottom line: make sure that you don’t start starting into the distance when somebody reminds you of things you missed out in the past.