Getting in touch with a new culture always puts pressure on yourself. Uncommon reactions and behaviour makes you reflect on your own frame of mind. In that way it can shake your own mindset upside down. Let me give a practical example. I have read a lot about the cultural redtape in India. In the magnificent book Maximum City from Seketu Mehta he explicitly describes India as the land of the NO. There is a local culture that inhibits that anything can be done but with perseverance a thousand NO’s ultimately change to YES. The key lies in the fact to keep asking.
I absorbed that observation. But I know, theory remains theory. However, today things got real. I had to call for a favour. There had already been some written discussion and things looked good. We had a phone call planned. With big expectations a dialed the number and the phone got picked up. I thought things were already somehow arranged but that was only my personal interpretation. I had to go to all the details again and had to convince the other party. I repeatedly ran into a big “NO, that’s not possible”. On that moment, the quote from the book appeared in my mind. I have got to hang on, I thought. I listened to the objections of the person and finally succeeded in getting some trust. I just kept asking gently and finally got to the grounds where I wanted to be. Afterwards both of us were really satisfied.
Bottom line: Hang in there and take the punches. Good things come to those who persevere.
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That was a very interesting observation Maarten. This happens all of the time in different forms. What I found most appealing in what you did is stay gently and kind to the person on the other side of the line.
Here in Canada, it is something a lot of us believe in. Being polite but determined. Sometimes though, the issue is washing down the actual intent of your message by being too careful.